Monthly Archives: February 2011

Response from the Church, part 2

Just a quick update to my post yesterday:

I just received a phone call from ‘my’ Bishop (whom I’ve never met). He let me know that he’s received a copy of my resignation letter, which was given to him from the Stake President. He simply wanted to confirm with me that I am aware of the “seriousness” of my decision, and warn me that I will lose all priesthood privileges (for whatever good it’s done me). I confirmed that I’m well aware of the ‘consequences’. He then said he’d send in the forms to Church Headquarters!

The phone call was short and to the point, which I really appreciated. I guess this means that I should expect a final confirmation letter in a few weeks.


Correction: I’ve just been informed that I have met my bishop once before.


UPDATE: Response from the Church, part 3


Response from the Church, part 1

Today I received a response from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (LDS Church) to my letter of resignation, which I had sent them back over a month ago. Here’s some background…

Last month, I decided to send an official letter of resignation to the LDS Church, requesting that both my name and my wife’s be removed from the records of the Church. As I stated in my essay (read it here in PDF or ePUB format), I no longer wish to be associated with the Church. I had read numerous articles from websites such as and, which have suggestions and templates for writing your own resignation letter. These sites also warned of how the LDS Church has made some go through countless hurdles and obstacles in order to finally get the confirmation of their name removal – some have even been excommunicated after having sent in their resignation!

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Conditions on Friendship

Now that a couple of weeks have gone by, since I made the announcement that I was leaving the Church, I thought I’d make some observations about the responses that I’ve received from family and friends.

First off, I’d like to say how grateful I am to the numerous supportive responses that I have received; these have been most kind, and needed in this time of transition. I have had many old friends, as well as distant family members, step up and openly support my decision by commenting on my various Facebook & blog posts. I’ve also been surprised so see how many people I know who have gone through a very similar process in their own lives. I’ve even been discussing some of my own cousins’ exit stories with them, of which I was either not aware, or was only told the Mormon perspective (as many of these events happened while I was much younger). This discussion has brought me closer with my cousins than I ever have been, which is the result I hoped for when releasing my essay.
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Instruction Manual for Life

I’ve been really busy trying to respond to all the emails and messages I’ve been receiving over the past few days. So, I just wanted to post a video that I think is extremely well done. It’s an animated short (about 8 minutes, which I know is longer than the average internet user’s attention span), which tells the story of a young man who grows up being taught one way of doing things, only the find that others don’t do it the same way… and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Here it is, for your viewing pleasure…

Let me know what you think.

Going Public

Well, it’s been a few days since I sent my essay/letter to my family and closest friends. For the most part, the responses have been very respectful and even encouraging (more on that in a later post). My family hasn’t said much at all so far, but that’s how they deal with things. My non-LDS friends have been very supportive, while my LDS friends are evenly split. Time will tell how they’ll respond to me, and my newly vocalized opinions, in the future.

I decided to release a more public announcement this afternoon via tweet and Facebook post, informing everyone I know on these social sites of my decision to leave the Church.

For those who would like to read my essay, you may download it from these links: PDF or ePUB (works great with iBooks for iPhone & iPad, or other eBook readers)

Life On The Outside

Hello everyone. My name is Tom.

I come from a multi-generational Latter-Day Saint (LDS or ‘Mormon’) family, with two brothers and a sister, in addition to my two parents who have been married for thirty-eight years. My upbringing was fairly standard for those of us born into the Church: I attended church each Sunday, was baptized when I was eight years old, received the Aaronic Priesthood when I was twelve, attended early-morning seminary classes before high school each day, and enjoyed the youth social events put on by the Church. I currently have many strong ties to Mormonism, since nearly all of my immediate and extended family, and close friends, are active members of the Church.

After I graduated from High School, my friends all started to prepare and leave on their missions. This is when I took my first step outside of the Mormon framework; I told my family I wasn’t going to go on a mission. This was the hardest thing I had ever had to do. I had also just started dating my future wife, who wasn’t Mormon and never intended to be. Six years later, I married my wife in a civil ceremony, officiated by my childhood Bishop-turned-Stake-President. My attendance to Church was sporadic prior to our wedding, and then non-existant afterward. I grew disillusioned and discussed with the Church’s superficial ‘friendships’ and its increasingly narrow-minded teachings. It’s been 10 years of being ‘less-active’. Over the last 4 months, I have been writing an essay entitled, “My Apostasy From The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints“, which contains a detailed analysis of how my values and beliefs conflict with those of the Church. It also contains much of the research I have done on the Church up to this point. Today, I gave this essay to my close family & friends. As I await their responses, I realize that I’m now starting a new life as an ex-Mormon.

I have created this blog as a way for me to share my experience, opinions, and beliefs of life after Mormonism, as I have found that others have helped me in this way. I hope to be able to further explore my religious, political, and societal views, and share them with you. I encourage questions, comments, and challenges to anything I write here. It is my opinion that we should all find ourselves in that uneasy state-of-mind, where we challenge our core beliefs, on a much more frequent basis, as this is when we truly learn.

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